The xmas day blog.

I could put here about how it was a year ago that me and the ex went to bed together, how she slept on her spot and things were perfect and bring the tone down.

Today is not about that. Its about, hopefully, your realisation about what you have, thats happend and all that yo uhave in the palm of your hand. wake up to what you want but at least wake up to believe.

as I write this someone i know i just said happy xmas to and just signed off after a min or 2 without reciprocation. Yes ok there aare many reasons for that, still doesnt prevent logic for hitting a real nerve

Dad called me yesterday, well actually his wife but no idea who it is seeing a there are 8 message on my mobie and ill bet that more are from the bank wanting dosh hence not reaidn them, well listening. Do i go today or not, i will let fate decide that.

There have been offers to come over tomorrow but i still believe steadfastly in family and xmas and as I write this flash backs happen to what was and what is. Yup, someone else where I want to be. Its amazing to experience christmas with a kid for the first time, utterly amazing.

Somtimes you realise a change is needed to make a difference, sometimes you realise that things and inventible and somtimes there is just no way out.

My destiny date is march 30th, if things havenet picked up by then, i give up, wholely, fully, with no more fight, ill give up

The xmas day blog.

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