All said and done its been a few strange weeks. Trying to move forward with life and work, messages from the ex and then today, a call from the shrink to see how Im doing. A month late but still nice to kinda get checked up on just makes me realise a few things…
Even though things seemed to have moved forward and the Duabi trip helped loads there’s still things that now, more than ever I know that Im not coping with what so ever.
There have been a few women who I’ve had more than a passing interest in however whenever I try to entertain the idea of moving forward on an interest the ex rears her head in my mind again. That just tells me that Im not over it and I did promise myself that unless I know deep down things are good I wont entertain the idea, I mustn’t and importantly shouldn’t. Forgiveness on things done in the past has never been a strong point.
Gah I just cant shift her from my head even after all this time and there was a point where she texted me and it killed me right down to the core not to reply. Such a massive part of me wanted it to be an olive branch.
Overall since being back from my trip things have gone ok. Lots of training at work, back to playing darts which pretty much is a highlight of the week to be around people and having a drink. Ok so not many may talk to me and its the old on the outside thing but hey, I’ll take it. Reminds me darts have been chuffed more than once so looks like new stems
Last week I hit london and on the way back from the train station the car was impounded. Its a long story but seems that my license wasnt valid for..oo… well a long time.
Well its 5.15 on a friday, tired and that only leads to negative thoughts so im wrapping this up on the promise that more updates will come soon.