Another week and another hospital visits. They really just checking that the gland in my neck isn’t anything serious, which I don’t think it is.
To be honest its been a fairly quiet week with nothing out of the ordinary to report. Well I say that but my to work colleagues seem to be working in cahoots with each other on some pretty big projects and of course that means that yours truly is being excluded from them.
I’m into minds whether to be bothered about this or not. Should I be getting upset at the fact that everything is going on which aren’t being told or explain to me or should I just keep quiet I keep my head down?
The only thing I really care about is how not knowing information about my job because I’m not being told anything paints me within the eyes of others.
Every three weeks I’m on call which in the past hasn’t been a problem because I blue is just enough to get me by. Yet with things changing all the time I’m no open communication about what’s going on is that I find myself/stumbling around blindly trying to find a solution normally in the middle of an emergency and with no help to fall back on.
I’m sort of edging towards me being quiet and keeping my head down stands. That way when anybody asks me why my knowledge is an up-to-date I can simply say “that information has yet to be disclosed to me”. Then if anybody says why haven’t you asked? I can simply go how are my supposed and ask what I’m not sure the question should be?
Surely it is much of a responsibility of my supervisors and managers to make sure that I have all the relevant skills and information as it is for me to know that stuff?
I was hoping that the dining when my new work colleague started weather’s that he would be open to sharing ideas and information but unfortunately he is pretty much a climbing on my other work colleague. Says nothing, keeps his head down and doesn’t share information. The best example of this is when I find out purely by accident that he is now and environmental health officer for where we work. It’s not so much that I’m bothered about being offered that position but so much the fact it was kept quiet for me by both people in the very office that I work in.
So I gets me wondering if there is this secrecy about the smallest of things what else am I being excluded from ? You might call this some sort of paranoia but there is plenty of other incidents that have happened that I shan’t going to right now?
All of this makes me realise how and why I started up my own company.
And if I ever get around to writing my autobiography I think I’ll call it the slight incline and major fall of me.